Chapter 450 - 83: Someone to Talk to
Chapter 450 - 83: Someone to Talk to
A large, really large number of wieras live under Saligia.
Why?
Are they all terrorists who think of nothing but evil?
No, they are not.
In fact, a very large part of them are not that ’evil’ actually.
But they... just can’t control themselves.
They’re consumed by a tendency to chaos that comes at the price of the ability to wield caora. On top of that, they’ve been in hiding for a long time. The Order, even if their numbers are small, is constantly hunting them. In order to stay hidden, Saligia silences anyone who dares to come out before they even realize what is happening. Even if they manage to escape from these two... they are afraid of society’s possible reaction to them.
As a result, even if they are not inherently bad people, chaos is ingrained in them. They instinctively like chaos. So they have no choice but Saligia, who gives them a helping hand through working for them.@@@@
But, as I said... they are not all ’bad’ people.
Especially the ones who have been transformed into one, rather than those who have been a wiera since birth. Because even though they are a different person than before, they still have the thoughts, feelings, and personality of their previous selves. They know what is wrong and what is right.
I am aware of this fact, I have been aware of it from the very beginning, so it was not difficult for me to understand the situation of the chained prince in front of me. So, even though I knew for sure that he was a wiera, I wanted to confirm the shreds of doubt in me.
And... I was right.
I guessed right.
"You can... help, huh..."
I thought that he was a threat that needed to be eliminated even before I came to Eshaware, based on what I had learned in the game, and also that I could use him to my advantage by acting before he failed on his own.
Who would have guessed... that the situation was actually quite different from what I thought?
Alith took a deep breath, having stopped pretending. His pale yellow eyes were focused not on me, but on the floor.
"I’m not the kind of person who... needs your help, no matter what the truth is."
"But I don’t think so."
His eyes twitched slightly, moving slightly, as if he had just realized he was in an uncomfortable position all this time.
"You should think so, though."
Finally, he looked up at me. His expression, although quite calm... was also vulnerable.
"You know that I am and will never be anything but harm."
"Well, yes. I do know that."
I answered honestly, because it was true.
His instincts were even harder to suppress than mine. How long he could hold himself together, stay out of trouble, if he tried to live without the means Saligia provided him...? It was a moot question.
"But that doesn’t change anything for me. I still think I can help you, and don’t think of it... as simply helping someone in a difficult situation."
Yes, I don’t want to help him simply because I can empathize with him. I’m obviously not a person of goodness.
"There’s one, actually several, points where I can get something out of this. I might learn something about Saligia that I don’t even know, I might steal something valuable from them. I’ll have the prince of the elves on my side, so I’ll have some international leverage. But, apart from that..."
He listened quietly to everything I said, thinking. But he focused especially on the last point, as I emphasized it.
"Above all, I will gain a potentially powerful ally."
I tore my eyes away from him and slowly ran them over the spirits still standing around us, watching us with great interest.
"I know how valuable the spirits are, because I have a skill similar to yours. Or whatever you call it. But... even I didn’t expect this much to be honest."
There were all kinds of spirits, really. At least one of each element. There were so many colors that I felt like I was going to have an epilepsy attack
His eyes twitched even more, his smile broke and reformed several times. With every word he spoke, he lowered his head further, his hair falling more in front of him.
Yet, after collecting himself a little, he continued.
"How I held back when Phloria tried to be a nice, cool big sister to me. The guilt I feel when I... imagine what would have been different if I hadn’t existed, if the original Alith had lived. How I felt when I took orders from Saligia and gave reports that slowly prepared the end of the kingdom, just because... just because I didn’t actually want to die. And the weight that lifted from my shoulders when I thought I could get out of this hell, when I finally mustered the courage and took the chance... when you appeared out of nothing and revealed my secret."
His voice was hoarse, his hair completely obscuring his face. Still, it was not enough to hide the tears that fell just below.
*******
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I couldn’t think of anything more to say.
Actually... there were. There were tons of things I could have said.
But the lump in my throat, the embarrassment of knowing that I could no longer speak without stuttering... held me back.
Still, I couldn’t help feeling a little relieved when Aiden Tenebra kept the silence, saying nothing. It was nice, I guess, to finally be able to say all these things to someone.
But... it wasn’t going to change anything. Find adventures at novelhall.Côm
I swallowed slightly, and then... my mind took me back.
I don’t know why, but I remembered the first day I woke up, the first night I opened my eyes to this world.
There were countless elves around me, constantly checking my condition. The guards were in a panic, trying to increase security and figure out what had happened.
But it didn’t matter much.
Because... the moment I opened my eyes, I knew.
I knew it, like it was written deep in my soul, which actually was.
I was... an impostor who had stolen this body.
I wasn’t supposed to exist.
The fact that I could think, that I was here... was wrong.
I was scared. My thoughts were all over the place, my emotions were chaotic.
But then, something happened that put all that on the side.
They realized I was awake. I was clearly watching the ceiling, after all. It would have been strange if they hadn’t noticed. And with that... three people appeared on either side of the bed where I was lying comfortably.
My father, my mother, and my sister.
The moment I saw them... I was relieved.
There was a warmth inside me, a feeling that everything was going to be okay which was untying the knots of my tangled thoughts, banishing my fears.
In that moment, what I though as a kid was simple.
So what if I wasn’t who they thought I was?
I was Alith, as much ’Alith’ as the person whose memories I had. I had no other name... no identity.
So... I gave myself over to the warmth, the love of those I would deceive for years.
And this went on for days.
I was almost addicted to their attention. Every moment without them was... frightening, because they were the only moments I couldn’t really escape from the truth.
I didn’t yet know what wiera or caora was, that the demons that would soon visit me were silently waiting in the shadows fully knowingly and patiently so that I could bond even more with my ’family’.
So that I would become a perfect puppet, easy to control.
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